Don’t worry, I waited to watch on Sunday, no early leaks here!

We pick up shortly after where the last episode ended with Jamie and Bronn leaving High Garden.  Jamie is still obviously in shock about what Olenna told him about Joffrey.  Bronn is going on about how he doesn’t seem very happy even though they’ve defeated an enemy, and Jamie says that this convoy they’re taking back is just to pay off the Iron Bank.  Bronn questions where the castle he was promised was, and mentions that High Garden is empty.  Jamie says he doesn’t want to live there, the dragon queen could come take it right back. (that seems really likely now anyway)

Cersei is talking to Tycho Nestoris in King’s Landing about repaying the Iron Bank, and he mentions lots of people will be missing their interest payments, and perhaps they should team up on more ventures.  Cersei is only concern in taking control over everyone in Westeros, and mentions hiring the sellswords of the Golden Company to fill in her forces.  These are mentioned as sort of the Men in Black (the best of the best of the best) of sellswords, and actually Jorah fought with them before he met up with the Targaryens.

Bran is hanging out in Winterfell, being weird, and Littlefinger offers him the Cats Paw blade.  He tells Bran this was the sword used by an assassin to try to kill him but Caitlyn fought him off.  Littlefinger (look I know his name is Peter Baelish but it’s just fun to call him Littlefinger) then seems like he’s trying to butter up Bran by telling him he would have been killed himself if it kept Caitlyn alive, and says he will do anything to keep him and his sisters safe.  Littlefinger starts in on one of his monologues when Bran asks if he knows who this dagger belonged to, and says how that question basically started the War of the Five Kings, made him who he is today, sent him beyond the wall and back home to find chaos, to which Bran replies “Chaos is a ladder.”  This really freaks Littlefinger out, because he said the same thing to Varys long ago in King’s Landing, which was his way of saying he’s willing to do anything to get to the top.  This is also sort of Bran letting Littlefinger know that he knows EVERYTHING.  Meera then comes into the room, ending their conversation.  Bran guesses that she is going home, and she says she doesn’t want to leave him but she needs to be with her family when they (the white walkers) came.  Bran doesn’t really seem to care, and she is really hurt.  She reminds him that Hodor (RIP!) her brother and Summer all died for him, and he just tells her that he’s not really Bran anymore, he remembers being Bran but he’s the 3 eyed raven.  She says that he died in that tree. 😥

Outside we see Arya riding up to Winterfell.  When she comes to the gates, the guards don’t recognize her and tell her to leave, Arya Stark is dead and she needs to go.  She says that if she isn’t who she says she is fine, but if Sansa knew that they turned her away they’d be in trouble.  They bring her inside and decide between them who will tell Sansa about Arya, but when they turn around she’s gone.  They go together to tell Sansa about her, and she knows where to find her.  Sansa finds Arya down in the crypts.  They hug, lightly discuss the long journeys they have had to get back home (I mean, discussing how Arya was blind and working in that crazy death assassin house or how Sansa had a psycho rapist husband who she fed to his own dogs…how does one really get into that…probably should wait for that talk), talk about how Ned’s tomb doesn’t look like him.  They hug again, it’s almost like the shock has worn off and they’re excited because the realization that they’re back together at home is amazing.  Sansa tells Arya that Bran has also come home.  They go to see Bran, sitting out there by that tree again…being weird.  He says that he saw Arya at the crossroads and thought she was going to King’s Landing.  When Sansa asks why she would go there, Bran answers for Arya saying Cersei is on her list of people to kill.  Sansa asks who is on her list, Arya says they’re mostly dead now.  Bran gives the Cats Paw dagger to Arya and says it’s no use in his hands.  Sansa asks where Bran got it, he says from Littlefinger, she says that no gift from him is without some debt being owed.

Later in Winterfell we see Podrick and Brienne sparring, and she is giving him advice with each time she bests him.  Arya butts in and says that he shouldn’t fight with someone like her anyway.  Arya wants to spar with Brienne since she bested the Hound, and Brienne reluctantly agrees.  Brienne is wielding her two handed sword and Arya has her Needle.  When Brienne says she will take it easy on her since she has the advantage, Arya says she’ll try not to cut her.  They spar, with Arya showing every bit of training she’s received over the years, from Syrio, from the Faceless Men, and the two come to a point (no pun intended) where they’re basically about to stab each other.  When Brienne asks her who taught her that, she replies “no one.”  Littlefinger is overlooking them while he’s talking with Sansa, they stop to watch them spar, and he gets a look on his face like “oh crap.”

Daenerys and Missandei are walking down the stairs, and Daenerys says the Unsullied would return soon.  Missandei says they’d better, Daenerys asks what happened between them.  She answers many things, and Daenerys looks at her like ‘oh girl spill it!’  She does not, she only smiles.  John Snow takes Daenerys into the caves below Dragonstone to show her the dragon glass.  While they’re down there he shows her cave drawings of the Children of the Forest, the First Men and the White Walkers.  (I laughed at this, only because the Children of the Forest and the First Men look like your run of the mill cave drawings, yet the White Walkers had details and eyes colored blue and you could see their ribs, like okay Johnny White Walker carver, make the rest of us look like idiots)

Daenerys believes John now, and says she’ll fight for the North, but only after he bends the knee.  He says his people won’t follow a southern ruler after what they’ve been through, and she says isn’t their survival worth more than his pride.  Their exchange was very similar to the conversation John had with Mance Raider at the Wall when Stannis wanted Mance to pledge to his cause.  There was some tension between these two…the good kind.  When they get outside Tyrion and Varys tell her that they’ve taken Casterly Rock, but when they tell her Euron’s fleet destroyed their fleet.  She’s furious, and accuses Tyrion of keeping his family safe rather than being loyal to her.  She wants to fly a dragon over to the Red Keep and burn it all down, they tell her not to do that, and she asks John what she should do.  He basically says the same thing they all say, that if she wants people to follow her she needs to show them she isn’t the crazed Targaryen daughter they’ve feared all their lives.

Later on Davos and John are coming down the stairs that lead to the beach (these stairs are ridiculous) and Davos mentions that if he just married Daenerys that would probably solve a lot of problems.  John says now isn’t the time for all that.  They run into Missandei who they have to explain why his last name is Snow, and Missandei doesn’t understand because where she is from marriage isn’t even a concept.  Further down the stairs we go to the beach where Theon comes up on the beach, and before he can even really say anything John grabs him by the collar and says he’s only alive because he saved Sansa.  When Theon asks where Daenerys is, John says she’s not here.

(Keep in mind, there is a LOT of time being rushed through between scenes this season.)

Back on the road from High Garden to King’s Landing we see Jamie and Bronn and a convoy.  The gold has gone ahead and the group is taking a rest.  Dickon (Sam’s brother, actually not a trash human) is telling Bronn and Jamie how this was his first battle and it wasn’t what he expected, and he knew some of those men.  Bronn hears the ground rumbling, and they look across a field, but they hear their enemy coming before they see them.  Bronn and Jamie start yelling for all the troops to get up and ready, and the Dothraki hoard come riding over the ridge.  When Jamie says they could probably hold them, suddenly DAENERYS RIDING DROGON COMES THROUGH THE CLOUDS, SCREECHING, LIKE SO COOL!!!

This is a really intense battle scene; Drogon burning people alive, Dothraki killing people and horses, total madness.  Jamie tells Bronn to go to that big crossbow dragon killing thing because he can’t shoot with one hand.  Bronn struggles to get over there, but manages to find it, get off one shot that misses, and another shot that shoots Drogon right in the shoulder!  Oh no, Drogon falls out of the sky but he lands, and Daenerys gets off and starts to pull at the spear in his shoulder.  Jamie sees her down and grabs a spear and starts to charge at her.  On an overlooking bluff, Tyrion stands with some Dothraki, which one of them says “your people can’t fight very well” and Tyrion is basically saying Jamie don’t do it!  Before he can get close to her, Drogon turns his head and is about to make Jamie a well-done skewer when Bronn jumps over and pushes him into a lake.  (RIP horses)

And that’s where it ended this week!  SO MANY DEAD HORSES! 😦 We’ll just have to see what happens next time, but we’re already into the last half of the season!  Until next time, happy sewing!